Saturday, 4 October 2008

Of Possibly Being A Bit Mental

Year 11 Boy: Sir? When I'm not at school...

Me: Yes, Year 11 Boy?

Year 11 Boy: When I'm not at school, do you still exist?

Me: Probably not no. You're homework still exists though...

And as bizarre as this was for a conversation starter it did stir up the old grey matter a bit. For the vast majority of the world I do not, in fact, exist. At no point do I cross their minds, at no point do they stumble across me in the street, in a bar, in a gutter. I am not a real person. To people who've never met me, I do not not exist. And, in all fairness, even some people I have met question how real a person I might be.

Which is sort of why I'm grown a bit more comfortable blogging. I started off only talking about the book - cos I wasn't comfortable with anything else. And now look? Philosophy. Sort of.

Anyway - I like this cos most people who read my blog don't know me. Have never met me. Have no idea what I look like, are unaware that I'm typing wearing a Dangermouse T-Shirt and shorts beneath a Big Winter Dressing Gown.

I might live on your street. I might be your neighbour. (Sinister no?) Worse still: I might educate your children (duhduhduhdummmmmmmmm) Terrifying isn't it?

Unless, of course, Year 11 Boy is correct. Unless of course I don't exist. This whole thing could be an entirely randomly selected group of letters accidentally created by some bug in the Blogspot brain.

Would explain a lot...

Oh, me thinks I hear a *Bing*

Or do I?

7 comments:

B said...

you are making my head hurty. but i think i have met you. were you just a group hallucination? is this why you get so edgy when people ask about your book?

ta for the writing advice. useful, even if you aren't real. thanks, i think?

Stephen said...

I always used to tell my first group of kids that I lived in the filing cabinet in my room. I was a robot who stopped working when the final bell went on a Friday afternoon and then I was plugged into my power source in the filing cabinet until Monday morning. Bless them, some of them half-believed me. Thinking that your teacher has a life of their own is almost as creepy as realising that, at some point, your parents have had/are having S-E-X!

Denyse said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DJ Kirkby said...

You. Are. Drinking. Far. Too. Much. Coffee...

watching9987 said...

B - yes. I'm good at head damaging, just ask my students (?)

Stephen - I tell my students I sped my weekends at Christian retreats reading the bible to old folks... And they believe me.

DJ - Yes. Always. It's what powers my heart.

Chris said...

'I tell my students I sped my weekends at Christian retreats reading the bible to old folks... And they believe me.'

Lies.

Anonymous said...

Well... You MAY live on my street... You MAY be my neighbour... But I MAY have gone out to lunch with your mam and step dad a few weeks ago... I MAY have followed you home last night... I MAY know your birthday, your shoe size... I may even have been in your bedroom... I may have sat on your bed. I may have heard you snoring... I may even be sleeping in the same house as you........ Then again, it may be wishful thinking...